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I am sorry to hear of this difficult situation.
Are you saying that dad wants to start having shared custody now four years later because he's moving to the same city where the kids are leaving?
I am not a robot. I am a senior retired family lawyer in Toronto.
After four years it's going to be very difficult for the father to get shared custody unless he has been seeing the children very regularly. Courts do not like to change a long-standing status quo if it's working well.
However, if the children are older and they want to live with the father half the time that could work.
What could also work is for the father to start seeing them more and more over the next while increase overnight access. After that has continued for a while he could consider applying for shared custody and would have a much stronger chance then.
Does that make sense?
Well the 12-year-old will be able to make a decision on their own but eight year old won't just yet.
So it would make sense for him to start to see the children regularly which could be once a week mid-week and every other weekend and then increasing it. She would definitely get less support if they each have the kids 50% of the time but really she should be considering the best interest of the children of course.
Well you might have to get a court order that perhaps the best approach would be for your partner to retain a family lawyer now and have the lawyer write her indicating that the hope is to resolve this amicably but if not your partner will not hesitate to proceed to court because he's going to fight for what he strongly believes in the best interest of his children.
You are very welcome.
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